Stop laughing at me. I’m a badass, can’t you see that?

Except the MTV award, I was only nominated. If it was in my life I would be the winner.

Jesse: I have a lot of cats, a lot of cat food, a lot of litter, and nothing else in the apartment.
Conan: So just cat paraphernalia is what you have.
Jesse: My whole life is basically just, you know, feeding and cleaning cats. And then I get to be the Sexiest Geek Alive.